Sunday, August 3, 2008

The demon inside of me

“Eyes, blank, lost, and empty, stare on, fixedly at the woman at the other end of the room. Within the mind, there’s havoc, a turbulent storm that’s building up fast, rage against a woman who so frivolously dismissed her to be the most hopeless student she’d ever come across, saying she had no hope in the future with anything, and might as well try correspondence or salesman ship for her career. “ Malevolence was the word.

Anger welled within her, blanketing her mind with deep dark thoughts. Her mind, that would never be capable to ever come up with even the nastiest word to insult anyone or ever think of hurting anyone, was thinking of so many morbid thoughts. Filled with sheer contempt, was her mind. That mind was mine. That girl was me.

I sat there just looking on, my face so blank, anger so heated within my head, it would’ve exploded. I felt a vein throb fast in my temple. I was surely losing it. And surely the only way to prevent me from losing all control was a distraction. The distraction was her torture, my imagination at its peak.

There as that filth of a woman rambled on with her lessons, I got lost in the most sadistic ventures even id never thought I would imagine. Oh well, now that I was, be on with it. And tell you what it felt good. Before I tell you what I thought I would tell you it felt Oh so good, to just imagine that woman shrieking her head off in my sadistic fantasy. My imagination was so vivid at the point of time, it felt as though it was all really happening, I could actually hear her shrill shrieks and screams in my ear.

Unfortunately, to actually carry out such atrocious actions, would obviously lead to my doom as well, so i'd might as well imagine it. I could get back at her either wise.

So here’s what went on in my mind. I felt so thrilled, at the thought of her being hung upside down, with hooks through her toenails, droplets of blood slowing trickling down her ugly mane. It was a train of processes, she went through. Imagining such things is so good, you keep the person alive, yet you torture them in a way that would kill them in reality. I saw her, her arm, very slowly, millimeter by millimeter, ripping off, her skin stretching and snapping, like cloth being ripped ever so slowly. I saw her face, pulled in the most grotesque expression, her face purple and screaming in pain. She was strapped onto a ply board, her arms and legs stretched apart, tied to pulleys in all four corners. The rope slowly pulled at her, ripping her limbs from her body.

All this form of torture may rather seem ever so exaggerated, but really, as I read it out, don’t you think it’ll make you feel content, after you imagine your most hated person going through the same?

So hence I carry on, this is what went on in my blackened devilish mind.

In my mind I saw myself closely observing her skin stretch further on, till it lost its elasticity and snapped. I saw the skin snap, then the veins, blue and red, beneath, then the flesh, curl and turn as her limbs stretched on. Blood fell upon the floor, one enormous red puddle, filling the floor. Her screams of pain echoed in the dungeons inside my head. Needles stabbed her eyes over and over; she could do nothing but scream. I saw flare guns appear from nowhere, and begin burning her from a distance, focused on spots all around her body, burning her slowly.

“Anees, come back to planet earth, you inadequate waste of skin and bone.” I heard her shrill voice screaming at me from across the class. All the other students were staring back at me. Her ugly face was blotched purple, the same way it was when she was being tortured in my day dream.

I nodded, and pretended to take down notes. Everyone got their attention back to the class. Never mind the embarrassment, this day dream was worth it.

As I wrote, a smile slowly curled across my face. The demon laughed and made merry.

The demon inside of me.

1 comment:

Vinns said...

i can a recall a somewhat similar incident. Way back in the fifth standard... and i was humiliated.. all crying and stuff.. and at that moment i wished her to be dead. Very sorry about that now... it was wrong i know but the strangest thing is that she actually died within a week.

i like ur name btw... is it real?